Fire! Fire!

Things I've learned in the last half hour:

1. The plastic on tea pots will melt if left on the burner too long.
2. Melted plastic starts fires.
3. There is no button to turn off the smoke detector.
4. If there is ever a real fire, Desdemona will not hear the smoke detector. Thus, it is the responsibility of my other roommate and I to save Desdemona from impending doom.
5. Melted plastic doesn't come off easily.
6. Dried and hardened melted plastic chips off beautifully.
7. SOS pads do a better job of cleaning up remnants of melted plastic on a metal range than does a scratchy sponge.
8. Melted plastic is like unto charcoal on countertops. If you brush it off, it will leave black streaks.
9. Soft Scrub with bleach is magic and will clean off those black streaks.
10. I am very grateful that we replaced the battery in the smoke detector quite recently.

The end.

Autumn should be a gradual process

I thought I was excited for the season change. Yesterday I was thrilled to finally wear a sweater outside in the afternoon without dying of heat exhaustion. The I woke up this morning. Thermostat read 62 degrees for my house. My closet was probably 10 degrees colder than that. I realized I don't have any dressy jackets--only my dressy winter coat, so I'm wearing my BYU windbreaker today. I got out to my car to find frost on my windshield. I scraped my windshield for the first time in many, many months. It hit me that I'll probably have to do this every morning this winter, since I leave so stinkin' early. My boss suggested I put a canvas over my windshield, then I just have to pull it off, no frost, no snow. This is an idea. I'll have to look into buying a canvas. Basically, I'm not as convinced anymore that I'm ready for winter.

Today was a crazy bus day. We got to UVSC and the guy across the aisle from me got nauseous and made the bus driver pull over in the round about to let him off. Just before the driver started to pull off again, people started yelling that we had a runner. So the driver opened his door again to let another guy on. Finally, we were off again. Problem is, by pulling the bus over in the round about, he wasn't able to fully make the turn. So we ended up driving around UVSC and not getting onto the freeway until Orem. The two guys sitting across the aisle (the one being the runner) started talking and discovered they both had unusual names. The one was named Adrien (or whatever the male spelling is) and the other, Fred. Apparently Fred's wife has told him that his name isn't a person's name--it should be reserved for plants and dogs. Part of me wants to name my next plant Fred in his honor.

Once again, I struggled sleeping on the bus. I finally fell asleep, just to make it difficult to wake up come Salt Lake. Don't you worry, though, the cool, crisp air did a fabulous job of waking me up as I walked from the bus stop to my building. I think they may have the north entrance open again... I should check that out so I can go back to my old stop.

I'm excited to drink hot cocoa today. Chillylint, may I join you on your morning adventure?

but... but... why???

Why can't we all just be happy?

Why must we assume that the world is out to get us?

Why do we not think we deserve good things?

Why do we make life harder than it is?

Why do we let drama play such a prominent role?

Why can't we realize that most things are not personal attacks?

Why can't we all just be happy?

Dare to be different

I slept diagonally across my bed last night. Because it was queen sized. And because I could.

Now you know... and knowing is half the battle

I was talking to Chillylint today about how funny I am. (Her words, not mine.) I concluded that every tragic dating moment has added humor to my personality in order to keep my sanity. I tried to convince her that it was quantity, not quality, that was important in this gift, hence why I am more funny than she. This post* is to convince her. And because I don't really want to go to bed or pack.

- Puppy Love: Kindergarten I was in love with him... I think. At least, rumor on the street is that we kissed. Though... I have no recollection of this. And I remember denying it. Then, his house burned down and he left me to move to Washington. Jerkface.

- All the boys in elementary, middle, and high school that dated my friends and not me. Especially all the boys I had crushes on. You probably don't know who you are. Their tragic moments are in the sin of omission.

- Catholic Boy: The one non-Mormon I really knew growing up. I had a crush on him from when he moved in in 5th grade until he moved out in 8th grade. He paid me no heed except when we were competing in band. He dated the cute, popular girl. He ended up committing suicide while I was in China... because another girl I knew wouldn't marry him because he wasn't LDS and she wanted to marry in the temple.

- Jolly Green Giant: I suffered through weeks of illness for him. That's tragic to be sure. He broke up with me so that he could move off to college and date other girls. He told me he was too good for me because he was in college and I was in high school. He ended up hating me because I maybe trashed his room. (He asked for it... quite literally. The hypocrite.) He was the reason I almost stopped pranking. What a tragedy that would have been! You would not know me as Dragon Lady today...

- Juan: Conveniently forgot about me when I was most enamored with him. Emailed my friend instead of me. Caused me serious stress and grief while trying to decide if I should date someone seriously in high school. Was a horrible writer on his mission, even though I was a good girlfriend (though I wouldn't admit to being his girlfriend) and sent him packages. Built me up, made me think I would marry him, then broke up with me at his homecoming. And after I sprained my big toe for him! After several months, we both ended up in Provo where we started talking again... and he was all moody and pessimistic about about dating. And his big head swelled to unhealthy proportions. We had a fight or two. We stopped talking for about a year. He showed back up in my life a month or two ago. Bringing back all sorts of emotions that I didn't want to feel towards him. At a time when I was trying to focus on someone else. That was really hard.

- 4-fingered Man: First, imagine dating someone with only four fingers on one hand. We drifted apart—I thought it was a mutual drifting. But then we had a class together in college and he thought we were still dating. Awkward. We played Junior High where our mutual friend, The Goblin King, was forced to relay messages. I finally told him I couldn't date him—he was going on a mission and I didn't want to wait for a missionary. (Conveniently not mentioning that I had just sent off Juan a month prior.) He put on a huge show of being heartbroken and how there would not be another for him. A week later The Goblin King spotted him on campus holding hands with another girl. At his farewell, he told me I couldn't have a testimony because I wasn't decisive.

- Secret Admirer: Stalked me. Sent me secret admirer messages. Made me wonder if someone was looking through my windows. Made me go on a scavenger hunt to discover his identity for our first date. Turned out to be my FHE brother. Made me conceal his identity. I only called him by his middle name to my roommates for a month. I was about brutally murdered when they learned the truth. Made a bet with me, I forgave him for losing twice. When he lost again, I declared myself the winner—he never paid up. I found out I was the topic of discussion in a panel of guys in his dorm put together to make decisions for all boys on their floor. And not just me... but the future of SA and I. After an argument about it just prior to Christmas, he stopped talking to me. And didn't tell me. (Obviously, he wasn't talking to me... how could he tell me?) I didn't realize what had happened for a few weeks. Spent an entire semester trying to figure out how to get him to say hello to me. He ended up marrying one of my favorite people from China. He still doesn't talk to me.

- Ferris Bueller: Fell for his wit and charm. He was my prince for a dance. He didn't fall for me. I was the swooning type; he was not the catching type.

- All the guys that didn't ask me on dates for my first 2.5 years of college. Again, sin of omission.

- Temple Boy: Perfect in many ways. Except, we didn't talk much. We just dated. For two weeks. The first one in my two week curse. I blame him for it all. He was the instigator, you see. Major flaw: everyone loved him... except me.

- Shaky Fingers: Didn't notice me in class until 2 weeks before class ended. The class had, maybe, 15-20 people in it. Made me physically ill a couple of times. First guy that I really dated that I knew I really shouldn't date. Made me watch March Madness scores update on his computer. I helped him with his white glove—cleaning an entire house inhabited by boys. Ugh. Moved after two weeks of dating. #2 in the curse.

- Trend Breaker: Held my hand on our first real meeting. Broke up with me for a reason I can't argue with and complimented me more in breaking up than most guys do in dating. I couldn't even hate him to get over my pain. I had to watch him, two weeks later, date, get engaged to, and marry another girl in our ward. He was the first guy to last more than two weeks in my college life. (Though, there was no friendship period first, which most guys have.) He lasted three. He was also the first to really break my heart.

- Accent: Took me to see Hitch. Awkward date. He asked me if I was going to play with my keys while we were at my door. Then asked if we could go on a walk.

- Pen pal: Got me to kiss him on a second date. Against all my better judgment. Then left for the Army early the next morning.

- Hebrew River Valley: Good friend turned boyfriend. Better as friends. Broke up with me at... you guessed it... two weeks. Now constantly asks me for girl advice.

- Black, not Sirius: most awkward date of my entire life. We talked about homosexuals, got lunch at Sensuous Sandwich, he informed me the bright green trim on his house was because they were turning the house into female housing, he wasn't hungry so put his sandwich in the fridge, then watched me eat mine. Put in a cartoon movie, then proceeded to give me a hand massage. Requested I return the favor. Sat too close, even when I moved to the other side of the couch. Awkward.

- Granola Bar: Day after two weeks, I rejoiced because it was two weeks and there was no end in sight. He broke up with me that night. Guy number two to truly break my heart. Only bright part—it ended the barrage of worry and concern from my parents who feared I would also turn into granola. Salt in the wound: I had gone so long without eating sugar that when I ate chocolate to comfort myself, it made me sick. It's one thing to break up with me for a reason I can't argue with, and to not hate him at all, or even dislike him; it's quite another to take away my comfort food.

- BMW (for those of you from work, this is not the same BMW that used to work in the Dungeon): Got me attached; refused to commit. Ran away at times of potential commitment. May or may not have lasted two weeks. Depends on when you start counting.

- Olive Wood: Was partly the innocent-scapegoat for my emotional breakdown last week, even though he did nothing wrong and was completely unaware... which made it worse cuz I couldn't really blame him, even though I wanted to. And because I miss him right now. And he doesn't know how to Apparate to remedy the situation. Rude.

- Anyone who should have made this list, but got forgotten: for not being memorable enough.

Honestly, Chillylint... and you wonder why I'm so incredibly funny?! Sometimes I wonder about you....


*Some of these stories, though all true, may have been slightly dramatized for effect. But only slightly. So, if you happen to be one of my ex's (which would be really random), and I say something you don't like about you, please feel free to debate me openly or in private. You should all know how to get a hold of me. If not, shame on you. Also, please note, I'm only listing tragedies here. I don't have time to list all the good stuff. Remember, there was something about all of these guys that made me like them enough to date them. I can honestly say that every single one of them were amazing guys. I promise. Really... this blog was written in good fun, with a jovial spirit, and no intention of slandering any soul.

I hate packing

I'm on a 5-day business trip right now. I packed everything in one little rolling suitcase and my laptop case. Everyone was shocked. And not because I typically pack a lot or anything, but because they couldn't fathom five days with such a small suitcase. I think they're all crazy. Really, what more could I need? I needed 2 dresses, 1 pair of dressy-slacks, a couple of t-shirts, a pair of jeans (that I wore there), and pjs. I needed a few toiletries (but remember that shampoo, etc., is provided by the hotel) including my hair dryer and curling iron. (Turns out the hair dryer was unnecessary—there's one on the wall by the sink.) My two pairs of dress shoes took up the most room. (Yes, I admit, I could have gotten by with one... but then I would have had to pick a different dress... and it was 2 am. Consider it my space splurge.) I packed a Book of Mormon, figuring I didn't need my quad, and then I had one in case I had an opportunity to give it away. I packed Myst as my leisure reading. I even packed an external hard drive that took up about a fourth of my suitcase. Really, though, what else did I need? And if it all fits into a carry-on... why pack something I'll have to check? That's silly.

Am I really that weird?

Pre-bedtime thought...

Someday, when I'm married, I want to stay at a Residence Inn. This experience just wants to be shared. It's not the same by my lonesome. It's incredible, but it screams adventure and company. I want to order groceries through the hotel and cook in my hotel room. I want to rent a car and drive somewhere, just to drive somewhere. I want to tour the city on foot. I want to cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie. I want to explore the hotel and whisper secrets about the people we see. I want to sleep in and stay up late. I want to just have a vacation, with no point to it, just to stay for a week at a hotel in some new city with someone that I can play with.

Peter Panning

I'm supposed to be updating my real life blog... I struggle. I was catching up on reading blogs today. I've gotten so far behind and had some extra time today. I got to one and as I was reading, I gasped internally when I saw real names and pictures of the person. Then I realized that blogs are not limited to people hiding behind a nym. This is silly that I needed this realization, since I have a real blog with real names and pictures on it. Even sillier because I'm pretty certain that most people who read this blog also know me in real life.

Sometimes I wish I had a really anonymous blog that had an audience. Even this supposedly anonymous blog is personal for every other Board writer and many readers. I even sent the link to my sister who doesn't read the Board so that she can keep up on my life, since I'm way behind on my real life blog. I think of things sometimes that I want to tell people, but I don't want people I know to read. Why is that? They're not bad things. I would have no problem saying them to someone I don't know well. A coworker, perhaps. But to those people that matter most, I hide them. To be honest, I can't even think of an example right now. But I know there was one that spurred this thought in my head. Apparently I really wanted to blog about it... [rolls eyes]

I'm having a great week. I'm out of town for a business trip. I'm staying in the most amazing hotel room, complete with a full kitchen (I even have a dishwasher!), a living room with a couch and fireplace, queen sized bed, and nice bathroom. They feed me a good breakfast and dinner. I'm enjoying the alone time, doing whatever I want... though, I've realized I'm too addicted to chat and talking to the people I love most. I've had good, productive days. I've learned new tricks, and I've gained a knowledge about our site out here that will help me communicated better in the future, and hopefully get things working more smoothly. I'm going to a conference tomorrow that will hopefully give me enough knowledge for me to secure another business trip sometime in the future to Hawaii. We'll see. (wishful thinking anyway.) Somehow, though, I'm still missing home. (Home meaning Provo, which, really has become my second home.) As crazy busy as my life is there, there are things there that I've learned to count on... and I'm missing them. A lot. Thank goodness for little things that can be done long-distance that make me smile. :)

I saw a billboard this morning for a grocery store. It said, "Home of the original Apple Macintosh," and had a picture of a barrel of apples. It made me laugh really hard.

There's a boy at the site I was working at the last two days doing a service mission. He sat next to me for several hours this morning. He's in a wheelchair and my first thought was, unfortunately, judgmental. But after today, I realized that he is incredibly bright and funny.
I feel rather stupid about my initial, unconscious judgment. I haven't laughed that hard at work for a long time. It made me realize that I miss working in the Dungeon... I miss working with people my age.

I don't want to grow up. I want to go back to being irresponsible and putting off my 10 page papers to the day before. I want to stay up all night and fall asleep in my Hebrew class of four the next morning. I want to not know what to major in and just take classes for fun. I really want to take basket weaving again and join another bowling league. I want to be busy doing homework in the evening instead of having my evenings free and everyone else doing homework. Ok... maybe not really. I like my job. I like my paycheck. I like not having the stress of deadlines and school. But I don't like moving onto the next stage of life without everyone else.

Wow... this makes me sound depressed or something. I'm so not. I am in a fabulous mood. I am loving life. I had a hard weekend last week, so this week is incredible by simple comparison. I randomly laugh just thinking about how things just slide off my back today that last week would have sent me into tears. I'm so glad that I'm not an emotional girl all the time. Boo to emotional weeks. (I think I know a person or two who will boo with me...) Cheers to happy weeks! (I just had a quote from the Village pop into my head... I don't know all of it... but here's one part: "I love you like the day is long!" Perhaps it's cruel of me, but I think that part is really funny. hehehe)

Special thank you's to all of you out there who bring smiles to my face. And a hug to all those who make me laugh and giggle. I can't wait till this weekend when we can all smile, laugh, and giggle all together again!

The wheels on the bus go round and round...

I hit snooze this morning the appropriate number of times. Then came the mistake--I got back into bed. I woke up again at 6:25. I have to leave my house before 6:30 in order to catch my bus. Needless to say, no makeup, no full water bottle, no breakfast, snack or lunch. (I did manage to grab the bag of cookies I made last night.) I was pulling out of my driveway at 6:28. I even had enough time to stand in line at the bus stop and wait for the bus to show up.

You'd think I would have been able to sleep on the bus today. I rarely have problems with sleeping on the bus in the morning. But alas, little things kept my sleepy eyes open for most of the trip. Even when they weren't open my brain was active. You know the songs where they take a bunch of random items and make music, such as the Blue Man Group banging on trash cans at the beginning of a movie to show how cool the sound system of that theater is? That was my bus this morning. I could have sworn the girl next to me was slapping her arm and snapping in a rather catchy rhythm. But every time I looked over, she was sitting very still, probably asleep, and the sound continued. I'm thinking it was something to do with the metal and window right there. At the same time, there was metal clanging from somewhere up by the driver, as well as the gentle hum of the bus. Then, there is the random and mysterious melodic tune that sounds from the front of the bus. It's on every 801 that I've ever ridden. And it's rather loud. Typically wakes me up. Grrr... I've always wondered what it is and what it's for. Anyone? Anyone?

As soon as we got onto the freeway, a deaf guy that rides the bus walked up to the driver and asked her to turn off the lights. Being deaf, his speech was hard to understand. I'm not sure she understood, but he didn't wait to find out. As soon as he had made his request, he turned and walked back. The driver, looking slightly confused, pushed a button so something started ringing. I wonder if she was calling UTA headquarters to ask how to turn off the lights because, when no one answered the ringing, she started playing with all the buttons on her dashboard. The only thing she accomplished was to turn the A/C on higher. Good thing I grabbed my sweater in my random choice of clothing this morning.

I know I saw every temple on the way up. I think I fell asleep somewhere just past Jordan River. Mostly because I remember waking up to a kinked neck and my big tube of paper I was carrying falling to the floor. The nice boy across the isle got it for me. At one stop in SLC, our driver turned away someone trying to get on the bus, because really, he'd just have to stand. But by this time, we were in the Free Fare Zone, so every bus stops at every stop. She recommended he get the next one. The North side of the COB is closed for cleaning until Conference, so I decided to try getting off at the previous stop, to see if it was faster. I watched the bus and the people walking to the COB that certainly got off at the normal stop. I beat them by about 30 seconds. Further walk, though. Not sure which is more worth it. At least, in heels. If I could wear my chacos, the decision would be easy. The elevator ride was uneventful.

As I sat down at my desk, I realized how many things I have to do. It's incredible. Especially since I'll be gone all next week on a business trip. Yipes. It'll be a busy day. I decided to get things running that take forever and my computer does on its own. Yesterday I had my coworker finish unzipping some files for me, since I had to run to a meeting. I opened the folder first thing this morning. Typically, it unzips into folders. Nope. Not today. After a half an hour of putting files into folders, I still have almost 3,000 files sitting in here, waiting to be organized.

All this before 8 am.

Watch out day... here I come.

Becoming too dependent...

I wanted to talk about something tonight... to write... to express my feelings. My first thought was, "Oh, I'll write about it on my blog!" And then I realized, I didn't want just anyone to read it. It was personal—definitely not something for the world to read. In fact, I wasn't sure I wanted anyone to read it. For a minute, I didn't know what to do... I was a little sad about not being able to talk it out. And that's when I realized that I spend too much time on things like the Board and blogs. I need to focus more time and energy on writing in my journal and keeping a private record of all the things I feel like I need to talk to someone about.

If you need me, you can call me... or can you?

The concept of long distance seems foreign to me now. I've had a cell phone with a nationwide plan for so long now that I forget that some places cost more money to call. I went to give a friend my work number today and realized that she couldn't just call me from a campus phone... because it's long distance. Cell phones are taking over the world, and even many landline plans now include free long distance. So why don't they just get rid of the concept of long distance? ... honestly... money hungry [grumble, grumble]...

Not always a small world...

I got on the elevator at work today with six other people. Every single one of us pushed a different button for a different floor.

Weird.

O- to A+

I found out today that I can't donate blood again until next July. And all because I took one little felucca ride on the Nile. Apparently mosquitoes don't bite you if you stand next to the Nile as opposed to being on the Nile. What nice mosquitoes they are. [rolls eyes]

I am very sad.

This is a plea to anyone who reads my blog. Will you please go donate blood for me? Pretty, pretty please with honey and sugar on top? It would make me incredibly happy. Really, it would.